IF YOU HAVE a penis, then you might already know that stimulating the pleasure-inducing prostate gland can lead to earth-shattering orgasms from your rear end. But did you know that people of all anatomies and genders can have anal-based orgasms, too?
Yup, anal orgasms are open to anyone down to explore butt stuff. An anal orgasm involves stimulating different parts of the anus, whether it be going right inside for the prostate or exploring the rim. A person may also need stimulation of their clit or penis at the same time in order to reach orgasm. Basically, there are lots of ways to have an orgasm that involves anal stimulation.
Here are some expert-approved anal orgasm tips to help you and your partner(s) achieve that monumental climax.
The first step is washing up. Being clean down there benefits both you and your partner. It’s a nice courtesy to them and it can help you to loosen your muscles and feel even more relaxed—important parts of achieving an anal orgasm, says Josh Gonzalez, MD, a board-certified urologist who is fellowship-trained in Sexual Medicine, and Astroglide’s Resident Sexual Health Advisor.
Once you’re all cleaned up, get yourself in the mood, says Barbara Santini, a psychologist at Peaches and Screams. This step can include watching porn, relaxing music, making out with your partner, or any activity that turns you on.
Explore yourself before bringing a partner into a mix. This can involve practicing with a butt plug to determine what type of stimulation works for you, says Gonzalez. You might prefer penetration, like inserting a finger or a butt plug. Maybe you don’t like the feeling of anything being inserted, but a vibrator around the anal opening lights you up. There’s no one way to feel or to go about this.
However, you should always use lube whether with a partner or alone.
The prostate is a walnut-sized gland tucked roughly 2-3 inches inside the anus, between the bladder and rectum. Its main function is to produce fluid that is expelled as part of semen during ejaculation. The prostate is surrounded by thousands of nerve endings that feel very good when stimulated just right. In fact, some people can ejaculate from prostate stimulation alone.
“The parasympathetic nervous system is active during arousal and erection,” explains Michael Ingber, MD, a urologist and urogynecologist at Garden State Urology. “After stimulation of the prostatic nerves, this can result in the activation of the sympathetic nerves, resulting in a powerful orgasm and seminal emission (cum).” Really, the mechanism by which it happens isn’t that important to understand fully. Just know that it feels damn good when stimulated, and you can have a really amazing orgasm.
The prostate—a.k.a. the "P spot"—can be stimulated in a number of ways, Ingber explains. Direct stimulation via manual massage can be done by gently inserting a finger roughly two inches into the rectum. “Make sure your nails are trimmed and that your hands are clean or use a glove,” suggests Ingber. The last thing you want is to actually scratch the inside of your anus with your nails.
If you have a partner helping you out, lie on your back and have your partner insert a finger inside you, making a “come hither” motion. Another way to stimulate the prostate is if you’re on your hands and knees. Then have your partner insert their finger gently (make sure to use lots of lubrication) and pressed downwards toward the floor, Ingber says.
Or, try a prostate massager: a sex toy that goes in your rear end and stimulates your prostate.
While they don’t have a prostate to stimulate, there are a few possible ways for people with a vulva to experience an orgasm through their butt.
One route for an orgasm is through stimulating the sensitive nerves around the anus, including the pudendal nerve. These nerves tend to be located near the sphincter—which is why rimming can feel so good. We'd recommend blending anal and external clitoral stimulation for a mind-blowing blended orgasm experience.
Another path to anal orgasm involves stimulating parts of the internal clitoris through the back door. The so-called G-spot (on the front wall of the vagina) and A-spot (also on the front wall, but closer to the cervix) are both reachable through anal penetration. It's a good idea to ease into it gradually, starting with external stimulation around the anus, Ingber says: “Work up to a finger, and you can also use toys to help.”
If your partner is enjoying stimulation from a sex toy and/or your fingers, then maybe you can think about inserting your penis. Of course, always use a lot of lube—silicone lube is typically better for anal sex because it’s thicker—and go slowly. And remember, if your partner is into it, keep the external clitoral stimulation coming, whether it's via a toy or your fingers.